Be My Lifeguard
by sevvyboy1fangirl
Summary: When Harvey suffers from severe panic attacks due to the events concerning Donna and Louis, can Mike comfort him? Marvey, possible panic attack triggers, spoilers, future slash, Please Review
1. Chapter 1

Be My Lifeguard

AN: Alright so Harvey is a tad OOC in this, but it's more compliant with Season 5. Also in this Rachel and Mike are not together. Please Review, also there might be some triggers for panic attacks, also Spoilers. And Donna is a bit selfish in this. Sorry. I do actually adore Donna but this needed to be done for my story. Marvey.

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Chapter 1:

Harvey couldn't breathe. Not only that, but it felt like he was drowning. His vision was blacking out, his stomach was rebelling, and he couldn't think straight. All he could do was try to make his way to the men's bathroom so he could break down in peace.

How could Donna leave him? After all they had been through together? She had been the one solid in his life for over the past decade. And now she was leaving him for Louis Litt? Bull shit! No! She would come back! She had to! But. What if she didn't? No! She would! She had to!

He heaved into the toilet, his mind overrun by panic, not even registering what was happening. By the time he had regained enough control to be aware of his location and to be able to control his body again over half an hour had passed. There was no way he could continue the day like this. But if he didn't Jessica would have his ass. But could he risk another episode while he was dealing with a client? No, definitely not. He was going home. Not even bothering to tell anyone where he was going, Harvey just grabbed his briefcase and got Ray to drive him home. As soon as he stepped into his apartment he got into some sweats and a t-shirt, falling into bed and letting his anxiety wash over him once more.

It was a couple hours later when he recognized the sound of knocking through his panicked haze. Against his better judgment he trudged to the door and opened it, revealing Mike behind it.

"What is it?" Harvey croaked, his throat hoarse from all of the mindless whispered worries and sobbing he had been doing.

"Oh my God, Harvey! Are you ok? I figured something was up when you just disappeared from work, but Jesus!" Mike exclaimed, leaning in to take a closer look at the usually strong man standing defeated and run down before him.

"I can handle it." Harvey said, trying to convince himself as much as his young associate.

"No. I'm coming in, I don't care what you say or think on the matter, you need someone here." Mike argued, pushing his way into the closer's home, not that the man put up much of a fight.

Harvey closed and locked his door before making his way to his couch, curling up into a ball, all of his energy gone, there was no point in putting up a front anymore. He was surprised by the arm that encircled his shoulders, pulling him against a warm solid chest.

"Hey, it's alright. I'm here for you." Mike said softly. That was the last straw, and with that soft utterance Harvey broke down. Openly sobbing against the younger man's chest, Harvey clung to him, and allowed himself to feel everything he had been holding back, finally letting someone else see his suffering. Quite a lot of time went by, all the while Mike was rubbing his back and whispering soft reassurances to him. After he had cried all he had pent up over this whole ordeal, Mike addressed him again. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Donna. She's leaving me to work for Louis. And she's most likely not coming back." Harvey finally admitted after some time.

"What!?" Mike gasped, trying to wrap his mind around that.

"It's all my fault. I couldn't give her what she wanted." Harvey said emptily.

"What did she want?" Mike asked calmly.

"She wanted me to be honest about my feelings for her." Harvey said.

"And?" Mike probed.

"The problem is that I don't have the feelings she wants me to be honest about." Harvey admitted brokenly. "I've tried, believe me, I have. But I just can't. I-I'm, I'm gay. I can't." Harvey put his face in his hands at that, trying to suppress another wave of tears.

The sight of Harvey broken like this tore at Mike's heart, and the knowledge of what had created this situation filled him with rage. "That's crazy!" Mike exclaimed, "You can't help who you're attracted to, and she should know better than that!" Taking Harvey's face in his hands, Mike made him look him in the eyes. "This is not your fault. And it's her loss for leaving someone as amazing as you." Harvey looked at him, slightly in shock and slightly in relief that someone was there for him. "You can't control being gay any better than I can. And even if she doesn't come back, I will never leave you again." Mike ranted.

It was at that moment that something shifted in the air between them. They were gazing into each other's eyes, when all of a sudden then both leaned forward at the same time. Their lips connected and even though it wasn't the ideal time for this to be happening, it was exactly what Harvey needed. When they separated they looked at each other, gauging whether or not they had over stepped their boundaries.

"I-" Mike started, only to be cut off.

"Thank you." Harvey said quietly, grabbing hold of Mike's hands. "Thank you for being here when I needed you most." And with that Harvey kissed Mike again, squeezing his hands in thanks, and being reassured by the answering squeeze he received. As they pulled apart once more, Mike reached up a hand to cup the closer's face.

"Hey, I'm always here for you. Life can feel like you're drowning sometimes. Let me be your lifeguard Harvey." Mike said, rubbing his thumb over the man's cheek.

Mike stayed over that night, though they went no further than what they had done already, simply holding each other throughout the night, providing comfort where it was needed. And by the time morning came Harvey was more stable and much more in control, Mike anchoring him. As Harvey got ready for work he thought about last night's occurrences, feeling relief at being able to properly lean on someone. While he had made a point to keep all of his emotions inside before, he could recognize when it was time for him to let someone in, and Mike was that someone.

Harvey had Ray stop outside Mike's apartment building and wait so he could get changed. As the two men approached the Pearson Spector Litt firm Mike took Harvey's hand, hoping to take away some of the stress building in the lawyer. As they got into the elevator Mike felt Harvey squeeze his hand. Turning to look at the older man Mike tried his best to be reassuring.

"Don't worry. I'm here, no matter what." Mike leaned over and gave a quick chaste kiss to the nervous man, stroking his thumb over his hand. As the elevator binged, announcing they had reached their floor, the couple let go of each other's hands, having agreed to keep what was developing between them low key for the time being. As the doors opened they stepped out on their floor, heading towards Harvey's office. "Do you need me for anything right now?" Mike checked.

"Uh. No, I'll be sure to let you know though." And with that Mike started out the door, halted by Harvey's voice. "Oh, and Mike. Thank you. For everything." Mike nodded, flashing one of his adorable puppy smiles.

As soon as Mike left Harvey felt his grip slip slightly, but not enough to be a true concern. The day proceeded normally, the only issue arose when he left to go grab some copies, and he ran into Donna. His former secretary was collecting copies when he got there, and when she turned around a look of hurt and resentment flashed across her face, and Harvey felt his chest tighten. Opening his mouth to say something, no words came out, his respiratory system already malfunctioning. Donna took this to mean something completely different and took the chance to speak her mind.

"Listen Harvey, you can't just refuse to talk to me about how you feel when it matters and then expect for you to be able to come crawling back. It won't work. You blew it and there's nothing you can do to change it." She said, her eyes almost glowing with emotion.

Meanwhile, the edges of Harvey's vision were going black and his train of thought had started to fall apart. This time, however, instead of going to the men's room, his feet took him to Mike's office. Thankfully the associate was in there, and when he looked up to see Harvey, red eyed and hyperventilating in his office door, he jumped up, closing the door behind the lawyer. Taking him by the hand he led the man to his chair and sat him down, trying to relax him however he could. As tears slipped down Harvey's face, Mike could've sworn that he felt his heart breaking. Glancing through the glass wall of his office, satisfied that no one was watching, Mike leaned up from his knelt position to press a kiss to the lawyer's lips, hoping to ground him. It worked slightly, the closer's breathing getting back under control, his eyes becoming more focused.

"Hey." Mike said quietly with a small smile.

"Hey, lifeguard." Harvey greeted back feebly.

"Whatever she said, it's not true. Don't worry." Mike reassured, rubbing soft circles on Harvey's knee.

"It's easier when I'm with you." Harvey admitted quietly, relaxing slightly under Mike's soothing tone and touch.

"I'm glad." Mike said, pulling him into a quick but comforting hug, neither of them seeing Donna's stunned face staring at them through the glass.


	2. Chapter 2

AN: Hey guys, ok so I know that their relationship started a bit quickly, but personally if I was in Harvey's situation I would want someone like Mike to be there for me like that. It's nice to know someone wants and accepts you. Besides there has only been kissing and cuddles so it's honestly not that fast. Anyway, please review, and I hope you like this chapter.

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After the small episode in Mike's office, the two decided to migrate to Harvey's office, Mike taking his work with him. Harvey was then ordered by the associate to lay down and relax, which he readily did, more shaken then he really wanted to admit by the recent events. So he laid down on the couch and let Mike sit next to him, Harvey's head pressing against the younger man's thigh, taking comfort from the contact. He drifted off into a light sleep, listening to the quiet scratching of Mike's pen across the document's he was working on.

Meanwhile, Donna was still trying to work out what she had witnessed. She had only seen the quick embrace and a small trace of tears on her former boss's face. It had taken her a moment to realize something wasn't right with the way he had quickly turned and fled the copy room, so she hadn't thought to follow him until a couple of minutes after he had fled. Because that's the only word for what he had done, fled. So when she walked past Mike's office and saw the associate knelt on the floor in front of Harvey, who was hunched over on Mike's chair, she didn't know what to make of it. She couldn't make out what was being said, but it seemed as though Harvey was pretty upset, which in itself surprised her as he never let anyone see his emotions. She highly disbelieved that he could be that upset about her leaving, and if he truly was then she figured it was his own fault for not telling her how he felt.

The rest of the day was uneventful and Mike was fully prepared to be heading home when Harvey cleared his throat to get his attention. Turning around, Mike met the lawyer's eyes, a question lacing his own. Harvey opened his mouth to speak, doubt etched in his features, before closing his mouth and clenching his fists, only to repeat the process.

"C-can, uh, do you m-mind..." Harvey's voice caught, his eyes darting to the floor.

"Of course I can." Mike said, reaching forward and taking hold of one of the closer's hands, giving it a reassuring squeeze. "It's no problem what so ever." Harvey sent him a look full of relief and gratitude.

The pair was making their way towards the front doors, able to see Ray's car parked by the curb, when Donna blocked their path. The ginger had a combination of determination, anger, and suspicion written across her face. As he heard Harvey's quiet gasp, Mike maneuvered himself slightly between Donna and Harvey, his arm bent behind him to brush Harvey's chest subtly, hopefully helping to ground the lawyer.

"What do you want?" Mike asked, trying not to sound rude.

"This has nothing to do with you." Donna said, shooting a frown his way before refocusing her gaze onto the closer. "This is between me and Harvey."

"Donna, I don't know what you want, you already went to Louis, what else is there?" Harvey asked quietly, praying she wouldn't say what he knew she would.

"Don't give me that Harvey, you know very well what I want. All you have to do is admit your feelings." Donna spat out, her face flushing with anger.

"I have nothing to admit." Harvey said, focusing on Mike, trying to remain in control.

"That's a load of shit. You don't seem to have a problem letting Mike through, so just tell me and this will all be over!" Donna cried.

Mike felt Harvey's hand latch onto the back of his suit jacket, which was his cue to extract them from the situation. "Donna you need to stop. Leave him alone for God's sake! Set your sights on someone attainable." And with that Mike side stepped her and led Harvey out the door, opening the car door for the lawyer and climbing in behind him, leaving a dumbstruck and fuming Donna in the lobby.


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Sorry it's taken so long. Here's the next chapter, I hope you like it and please please please review, i love reading them. I'm working on the next chapter right now, so hopefully it will be posted soon.**

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Chapter 3:

It was Friday, so as they made their retreat Mike was comforted by knowing he had the weekend to be with Harvey. He was honestly confused as to how Donna could be so petty, especially after all she and Harvey had been through together. At least Harvey was in his care now though, and that calmed Mike slightly.

Once they had made their way inside and Harvey had lent Mike a pair of sweatpants and a shirt, they settled themselves on the couch. Harvey had been silent for a while and Mike kept shooting him concerned and caring looks. Finally deciding to break the silence, Mike opened his mouth, only to be cut off by Harvey.

"Why are you doing this? There must be things you'd rather be doing." Harvey said in a monotone voice, looking straight ahead and avoiding Mike's gaze.

"What are you talking about? There's no place I'd rather be than right here by your side." Mike said, shocked at the words that had come out of the older man's mouth.

"No, really. Why? I'm so pathetic. Why even-" Now it was Harvey who was cut off by an enraged Mike.

"Stop it! You are not pathetic and I don't want to hear it! No one can be at their best all of the time. And the ones who pretend that they are, are full of shit! I'm here because I care about you, and I have for years. Why wouldn't I want to be here to help you through this. And I don't know what we are at the moment, but I've liked you for a long time, and this doesn't change that. I'm not going anywhere. I won't leave, I promise." Mike assured, quieter than he was when he started. "You aren't pathetic. Even the strongest swimmers need a lifeguard."

Harvey had turned to look at him during the course of his speech, his eyes wide with astonishment and gratitude. "Mike, I can't even begin to express how grateful I am to you. And I'll be whatever you want us to be."

And with that Mike reached forward and tugged Harvey towards him, pulling the other man's lips onto his own. They both sighed at the contact, leaning further into the other. Harvey rose one harm to wrap around the smaller man's waist and interwove the fingers on his other hand through his associate's hair, bringing his mouth even closer. Their tongues fought in a battle of dominance and Harvey quickly won. He leaned forward, pressing his weight against Mike, pushing him backwards so he was laying on the couch, and tightened his grasp on him. Mike broke away from the kiss, took in a quick breath of air, and then started trailing kisses down his boss's neck, sucking until he left a hickey on Harvey's pulse point, drawing a moan from the lawyer.

After a couple minutes they slowed down to just cuddling and the occasional sweet kisses. Mike looked up to where Harvey's head was rested on his shoulder and tightened his grip on the man's back.

"Better now?" Mike ventured.

"Much, thank you. Wanna watch a movie?" Harvey asked, placing a quick peck on the smaller man's lips, grabbing the remote when Mike answered him with a small nod.

As they laid there and watched the movie, they took comfort in their closeness. Both of them thinking how lucky they were to have found this. As the movie played on they both eventually fell asleep, curled up together on the couch. Both slept soundly.


	4. Chapter 4

**AN: Sorry that this is so short. I'm gonna write more, I just need to work everything out in my head first. Please review!**

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Chapter 4:

Mike woke up to the smell of bacon, and he thanked whatever god was listening that he wasn't a vegetarian. Sitting up from his spot on the couch, he rolled his head to get a kink out of his neck as he looked around. He caught sight of the back of Harvey as the lawyer stood in front of his stove, and he tried to stop himself from drooling over the view he had of the man's ass.

"I didn't know you could cook." Mike said amusedly.

Harvey turned to look at him, a smirk adorning his face as he responded. "Who else would?"

"Good point." Mike conceded. "You could always just get take out. That's what I do, with the schedule you have me on I don't have time for much else."

"And keep this figure? What are you smoking? On second thought, don't answer that." Harvey snarked.

"Hey, I bike to work everyday, of course I'm in shape." Mike laughed, getting off of the couch. Coming to stand behind Harvey, he wrapped his arms around the taller man's waist, pulling him close.

"Hey." Harvey whispered.

"Hey." Mike whispered back, laying a kiss on Harvey's shoulder. Harvey leaned down and captured Mike's lips in a short, chaste kiss. Pulling away, Harvey turned his attention back to their breakfast.

"So what are we? Like, what should I call you? Because boyfriend seems a bit too teenage-y." Mike asked, as they sat across from each other over breakfast.

"Yeah, I'm not a 'boyfriend'." Harvey chuckled. "I don't know what we are. I just know that I only want to be with you." He admitted, his statement trailing off, a slight blush staining his cheeks.

"I just want to be with you too. I guess we can see where this goes. But I like how this feels. More than previous relationships." Mike confessed, his eyes darting from Harvey to the tabletop and back again.

"Me too." Harvey agreed. "So, what? Partner? Lover?"

"Companion." Mike added in a dramatic voice, drawing a snort from the older man.

"But seriously? What?" Harvey pressed.

"I like lover, my Grammy had a term she used to use. My parents used it too. But I think I'll keep that to myself until I know if it's right or not." Mike said, the last part more to himself than to Harvey.

"Alright, then lovers it is." Harvey said, deciding not to push the matter.

"So, lover, what would you like to do today?" Mike asked cheekily.

"I think I just wanna stay here, to be honest." Harvey said, looking at Mike to see if their was any rejection to that.

"Sounds good to me. And it's supposed to rain later so that works out perfectly. I like to be inside during storms anyway." Mike said, murmuring the last part. Harvey raised an eyebrow at that, but he figured if it was important he'd find out later.

"So, here's the important question. Lethal Weapons or James Bond?"


End file.
